I'm Really Angry

I tried to take a break and disappear for a little bit. Hiding under a rock always seems like the most comfortable thing to do when reality is too hard to handle. 

But I couldn't.

Because I'm angry.

I'm angry in a really dangerous way. And I'm going to share something that I probably shouldn't....I'll probably get in trouble for saying this....but...

I felt compelled to get on a plane today to Jordan to stand face to face with the coward that  murdered Jimmy, Kevin and Matt at point blank range, with an AK-47....and I wanted to (insert terribly bloody comment about killing that person with a sharp knife in a region that would make him bleed a slow death).


Saying and writing that sounds disgusting. It sounds like I am at the same, cowardly place as that guy. Whoever he is.

And I know, intellectually, that I am above that. I am educated. I am human. I am a woman. I shouldn't say or think such dark things... I understand that we are all humans and we all want the same things in life: we want to love and to be loved, be healthy and live a happy life. Period. The rest is just gravy.

They weren't in combat.

They were driving their vehicles and entering the base as they and the rest of their team did every day. The team that was supposed to be protected by King Abdullah and his army. The team that we, YOU AND ME, as US citizens and taxpayers, let down. The team that was let down by the entire US government. They weren't wearing armor. They weren't armed with proper arms because they weren't in combat. They were targeted by a Jordanian soldier and simply put: murdered. Was he an ISIS infiltrator? Maybe. Was he radicalized? Probably. Was he ostensibly our ally? You bet.

This is an injustice not only against me, my family, and the families of Kevin and Matt. This is an injustice against you.

We are giving Jordan billions of our dollars every year and this is what we get? Our brothers and sons coming home in metal caskets draped in American flags?

Please pardon my lack of diplomacy and grace, but, are you fucking kidding me?

We shouldn't just be sad, we should be furious.

I'm angry and you should be too.

President Elect Donald Trump, I have your first assignment and we need to address this now. I am here to lead the cause...whatever it takes. Ship me to anywhere in the world. Have me talk to whoever I need to talk to. Put me to work, please. I am standing here waving my arms at you, begging to join the cause.

#enoughisenough. I am doing this for Jimmy, Matt, Kevin and every single soldier and family member who has "paid the ultimate sacrifice".

I am sick and tired of hearing that. No one else needs to pay the ultimate sacrifice.

Enough is enough, on every single level. We should all be furious, not just me. #forjimmy

The Sadness Spectrum

My Speech for Jimmy

My Speech for Jimmy